Thursday, February 25, 2010

The CHENI@D:
Volume Ten

by Bill Costley


Book CIX: CHENEY WALKS

"Surviving 5 heart attacks makes Cheney unusual, showing that he has good medical care as well as a particularly aggressive form of heart disease." (AP Feb 24, 2010)

CHENEY walks taller now in a District
that has long known him all too well,
from White House to GWU Hospital.

He’s ‘He Who Walks Tall,’
taller than all of his enemies,

taller than his breaking wave of well-wishers,
admiring his ability to navigate political currents
as political sharks drift lazily down every street,
intent on drawing political blood daily.

Once again, Cheney’s the day’s top story,
thanks to his heart. Thanks to his heart;
thanks to his heart. “Thank you, heart,”
he prays as he falls to his knees again.


Book CX: CHENEY WINS

CHENEY wins the 2009 Prize
for Most Obvious Dictator
in the English-speaking world
& smiles crookedly:

“Maybe next year, the whole
wide world; it's watching me,
wanting to see how I’ll topple
that college professor Obama
who works from lecture notes;
me, I work by long-range plan.”

& locks up the transparency.


Book CXI: AFTER CHENEY FELL

After CHENEY fell,
he rose again on the 3rd day
& shuffled to the windows,
beholding the fed.District
laid out before him:

“I have finally conquered
this & all that this controls;
I only have to raise my hand…”

& stopped mid-sentence, his
crooked grin straightening,
& leant on the windowsill,
remembering his heart or
what was once his heart.


Book CXII: DOJ RENAMED

"It will be necessary for us to be a nation of men, & not laws," Dick Cheney said. 
The Guardian 11 MAR  10

CHENEY’s pinstriped daughter Liz spearpoints
Keep America Safe (KAS), calling a spade a blade;
calling lawyers who defended terrorists
“the al-Qaida seven", renaming 
the department of justice (DOJ) 
the "department of jihad".(DOJ);

Kenneth Starr, former solicitor general
& independent counsel who investigated Bill Clinton,
& Dubya's former acting attorney general, Peter Keisler
describe her attacks on the 7 lawyers as "shameful"
& undermining the struggle against terrorism:

"As attorneys, former officials, & policy specialists
who have worked on detention issues, we consider
her attacks both unjust to the individuals in question
& destructive of any attempt to build lasting mechanisms
for counterterrorism adjudications.”

Keep America Safe (KAS) dir. Aaron Harison rebuts:
"The American people have a right to know
who in the department of justice (DOJ)
is setting policy regarding detention
of terrorists & related national security issues,"

"Lawyers in private practice have the right
to volunteer pro bono to defend terrorists.
However, membership in the legal profession
does not immunise a person from questions
or criticism of their prior actions."


Book CXIII: ROVE DIDN’T WANT CHENEY

an edited newspoem

Rove didn't want CHENEY
to be Dubya’s  running mate:.
"I thought it was a bad idea,"
Rove told CNN's John King :

"I told Dubya the campaign didn’t
need "Wyoming's 3 electoral votes" &
would be better off not worrying about
"CHENEY's voting record, health, &
having been Bush 41's SecDef – we were
trying to develop a separate image for 43."

CHENEY was reluctant. Rove saw him
"squirm as Dubya pressed him to accept...”
CHENEY had a clear understanding of what

John Nance Garner, FDR's 1st VPOTUS said:
it was 'not worth a bucket of warm piss,'" but
"CHENEY was too much of a patriot
to act on that (pissy) knowledge."


Book CXIV: CHENEY Q-BACKS

CHENEY (R) Q-backs the redhot
U.S. Senate R-campaign in FL,
saying Obama-friendly FL Gov.
“Charlie Crist (R) cannot be trusted to
even remain a Republican,” implying
Crist’ll run as an Independent against
FL House Speaker Marco Rubio (R) &
“that would only benefit Democrats” so
CHENEY backs Rubio, the TeaParty fave.


Book CXV: CHENEY AU BAR

CHENEY sits in a FL bar
far from where liberals are,
nursing a Shirley Temple dry,

listening to local AM radio
for news of Crist vs Rubio,
smirking at its internecinity.

“Thank God for ex-Cubans”
he murmurs, cheerily; nearby
2 bar-flies stare blankly.


Book CXVI: CHENEY WIPES

CHENEY wipes his red
nose with a smooth napkin
pretreated by a brand of oil
he knows the name of but
won’t say ‘cuz it’s a rival’s.
“I will never ever say BP
Oil for the Manly Nose,
g-dammit, there, I’ve done it!”
Brand loyalty among oil-men
is intense; some dump rivals’
oil on the sand rather than
wipe their aching asses with it.


Book CXVII: CHENEY BURPS

CHENEY burps at the chaos
caused by uncontrollable oil
in the Great American Gulf.
“That’ll teach’m to drill there.
Obama’s a fool to authorize it.
My own oil’s in the Persian Gulf
where they know how to do it!”
thinking of his Winter vacation
in beautiful, oil-rich Abu Dhabi
far from such bubbly troubles.


Book CXVIII: CHENEY FEELS FOR

CHENEY feels for his balls
in his sleep, thinking: how they
were once as hard as pool-balls
when he racked the WH baize.

“It doesn’t really matter @ all!
I have lots of new balls in play
now that Scooter’s boxed, &
Petraeus replaces McChrystal.

I still have my own 2Q balls!”


Book CXIX: CHENEY LAUGHS

 CHENEY laughs when he reads that
Karzai “warmly praised” McChrystal.
“F’n right he did. That lame-ass s.o.b.
is right out of the CHENEY playbook!”
"Can it get any better?” (he thinks), I
own'm all, coming & going; I make'm
all say & do just what I want, when.”
CHENEY's the dramaturg of oil wars,
(but not oil-accidents; those he avoids)
“I want that oil to flow & burn, I want
to see those columns of black smoke
rising on the desert & the battlefield.”


Book CXX: CHENEY SPITS

CHENEY spits as the AM-radio
says Crist polls 42%, Rubio 31%.
“Where the f’r  all  those greasy 
ex-Cubans?” forgetting it’s only
angloradio, not radioespanol
where Rubio polls a cool 110%.
“I’m told Rosy Ruiz is 100% for
that greasy bag of plantain chips!”.
2 bar-flies stare blankly as he raves;
neither understands English, both
are (indeterminate) war escapees.


Click here for Volume Eleven


Bill Costley has served on the Steering Committee of the San Francisco Bay area chapter of the National Writers Union. He lives in Santa Clara, CA.
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