by Mike Mesterton-Gibbons
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| Like many people, Mr Goxx is dabbling in cryptocurrency, hoping to strike it rich. He's notable for two reasons: first, he is making money, with his lifetime career performance up about 20% –beating many professional traders and funds. Second, Mr Goxx is a hamster. The business-minded rodent has a trading office attached to his regular cage. Every day, when he enters the office, a livestream starts on Twitch, and his Twitter account lets followers know: Mr Goxx has started a trading session. By running in his "intention wheel", he selects which cryptocurrency he'd like to trade, as the wheel spins through the different options. His office floor has two tunnels nearby: one for buy, one for sell. Every time he runs through a tunnel, the electronics wired to his office complete a trade according to Mr Goxx's desires. —BBC News, September 27, 2021 |
Pronounce F T S E the Footsie way,
Lest others think you're too naive to trade—
Although, as Fur Topped Stock Exchange, you may
Yet stupefy them with the gains you've made!
In Germany, a hamster, Mr. Goxx,
Negotiates his treadmill like a chess
Grand master, moving pieces of his stocks
From here to there to rival the success
Of Footsie and the Dow. By racing through
Opposing tunnels, he can buy or sell
The cryptocurrency whose trade is due
So expertly, he makes his holdings swell ...
It makes you ask why Wall Street bank elites
Earn such high pay—for trades a hamster beats!
Mike Mesterton-Gibbons is a Professor Emeritus at Florida State University. His acrostic sonnets have appeared in Autumn Sky Poetry Daily, Better Than Starbucks, the Creativity Webzine, Current Conservation, the Daily Mail, the Ekphrastic Review, Grand Little Things, Light, Lighten Up Online, The New Verse News, Oddball Magazine, Rat’s Ass Review, The Satirist, The Washington Post, and WestWard Quarterly.