by George Salamon
"The birds are breeding and running amok in Pinecrest, Fla. The village will test a novel solution to rein them in: peacock vasectomies." —The New York Times, August 9, 2023
It's not just novel; it's
cruel and unusual.
but who will take the
case for the birds all
the way to SCOTUS?
The procedure will be
done without peacock
consent and snip the
honesty of their promise
to beget by displaying
beautiful plumage freely
and proudly. Now falsely.
The male peacock is a
a born polygamist "bona
fide" as the vet who'll do
the snipping admits, so I
say:
No consent, no vasectomy,
Let Peacocks be Peacocks!
George Salamon expects Yankee ingenuity, even way down South, could find a better solution for the problem in Pinecrest, Fla.