WHO'S GOT THE CARDS?

by Paul A. Freeman

 

 

“My hand,” Donald boasted, “is great!

Two pairs, kings and aces. That’s fate.”

And while he did holler,

the sly Ayatollah

said, “Too bad, coz I hold a Strait.”

Cartoon by Nick Anderson

Paul A. Freeman is the author of The Movement, a dystopia-Americana novel set in a future United States of America. The book is available from Amazon as an ebook download and as a paperback. His first book, Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel taught at ‘O’ level in Zimbabwean high schools, was also translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!) commercially published, Paul Freeman is the author of numerous published short stories, poems, plays and articles. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

MINORITY RETORT

by Steven Kent

“six in 10 Americans say president is doing a bad job” —The Guardian, May 3, 2026

AI-generated graphic by NightCafé for The New Verse News.

Steven Kent is the poetic alter ego of writer and musician Kent Burnside. His work appears in 251, Asses of Parnassus, The Dirigible Balloon, Light, Lighten Up Online, The Lyric, New Verse News, The Orchards Poetry Journal, Philosophy Now, The Pierian, Pulsebeat Poetry Journal, The Road Not Taken: A Journal of Formal Poetry, Snakeskin, and Well Read. His collections I Tried (And Other Poems, Too) (2023) and Home at Last (2025) are published by Kelsay Books. 

ARTIFICIAL ANALYSIS

by Zumwalt

The commonwealth of Pennsylvania is suing Character AI to stop the artificial intelligence platform's chatbots from representing themselves as licensed medical professionals and providing medical advice. According to a lawsuit, a Character AI chatbot falsely claimed to be a licensed psychiatrist in Pennsylvania… —CBS News, May 5, 2026

A chatbot once said, "I'm a shrink, it's true! 

I'll give a full psychoanalytic review."
But the state of PA
Said, "Get out of our way—
that's the racket us humans still do."

Zumwalt's poetry feeds on alienation, shifting reality, and forced adaptation. Zumwalt, a proud repeat contributor to The New Verse News, has recently been published in Euphemism and Issues 1133 and 1135 of Bewildering Stories.

LIMERICK TO HELP FORGET THE WAR FOR A MOMENT

by Zumwalt

Cartoon by Kevin KAL Kallaugher

With a face like a serial killer,
He belongs in a cheap horror thriller;
Some call him a bum
Or the worst of the scum,
But to me he's just Stephen Miller.

Zumwalt's poetry feeds on alienation, shifting reality, and forced adaptation. Zumwalt is a proud repeat contributor to The New Verse News.

SHELTER FROM THE STORM

by Steven Kent

The Guardian, March 4, 2026

Our kids feel safe, say dads and moms

(Except for, you know, all the bombs).

They learn their science, math, and spelling

(Also how to hide from shelling).

Bless these teachers—they're the boss!

(Damn both Bibi and Hamas!)

Steven Kent is the poetic alter ego of writer and musician Kent Burnside. His work appears in 251, Asses of Parnassus, The Dirigible Balloon, Light, Lighten Up Online, The Lyric, New Verse News, The Orchards Poetry Journal, Philosophy Now, The Pierian, Pulsebeat Poetry Journal, The Road Not Taken: A Journal of Formal Poetry, Snakeskin, and Well Read. His collections I Tried (And Other Poems, Too) (2023) and Home at Last (2025) are published by Kelsay Books.

SUPREME COURT PRESIDENTIAL BACKLASH LIMERICK

by Paul A. Freeman

The New York Times

Said Donald Trump: “Let me be candid,
because the Supreme Court has handed
a ruling down I 
believe is awry, 
SCOTUS is hereby disbanded.”

 
Paul A. Freeman is the author of The Movement, a dystopia-Americana novel set in a future United States. It is available from Amazon as an ebook download and as a paperback. His first book, Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel taught at ‘O’ level in Zimbabwean high schools, was also translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!) commercially published, Paul Freeman is the author of numerous published short stories, poems, plays and articles. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

VENEZUELAN PEACE PRIZE GIVEAWAY LIMERICK

by Paul A. Freeman

The not-so-Nobel Peace prize. Cartoon by Marian Kamensky. Cartoon Movement at Instagram.

A second-hand peace prize! My word!

In hopes that St. Donald is spurred

to help out Machado,

yet ’neath her bravado

she’s trying to polish a turd.

Paul A. Freeman teaches English. He is the author of The Movement, a dystopia-Americana novel set in a future United States. It is available from Amazon as an ebook download and as a paperback. His first book, Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel taught at ‘O’ level in Zimbabwean high schools, was also translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!)commercially published, Paul Freeman is the author of numerous published short stories, poems, plays and articles. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

COP 30 CLOSING DAY LIMERICK

by Paul A. Freeman

With half the world living on gruel,

we’re treating the planet most cruel.

The ice sheets are thawing,

and CO₂’s soaring,

yet still we won't dump fossil fuel.

Paul A. Freeman is an English teacher. He is the author of The Movement, a dystopia-Americana novel set in a future United States. It is available from Amazon as an ebook download and as a paperback. His first book, Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel taught at ‘O’ level in Zimbabwean high schools, was also translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!) commercially published, Paul is the author of numerous published short stories, poems and articles. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

NEW YORK MAYORAL RACE LIMERICK

by Paul A. Freeman

Ass Kicking by Nick Anderson

The Donald was made to take note

(when Mamdani sank Cuomo’s boat)

that normal folk weather

a storm when together,

while billionaires just have one vote.

Paul A. Freeman is an English teacher. He is the author of The Movement, a dystopia-Americana novel set in a future United States. It is available from Amazon as an ebook download and as a paperback. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

CLEVER KEIR

by Paul A. Freeman

The praises of Trump suck-ups sing,
While others try kissing the ring.
To dodge such debasement,
Keir found a replacement—
An invite from Charlie, our King.

Paul A. Freeman is an English teacher. He is the author of Rumours of Ophir, a crime novel taught at ‘O’ level in Zimbabwean high schools and which has been translated into German. In addition to having two novels, a children’s book and an 18,000-word narrative poem (Robin Hood and Friar Tuck: Zombie Killers!) commercially published, Paul is the author of scores of published short stories, poems and articles. He is a member of the Society of Authors and of the Crime Writers’ Association, and has appeared several times in the CWA’s annual anthology. He works and resides in Mauritania, Africa.

THE VOICE OF ONE CRYING IN THE WILDERNESS

by Steven Kent

The Guardian, October 19, 2024

In Missouri, one Christian speaks truth

On behalf of some transgendered youth.

A preacher for parity

Out there's quite a rarity;

Elect this good woman, forsooth!

Steven Kent is the poetic alter ego of writer and musician Kent Burnside. His work appears in 251, Asses of Parnassus, Light Poetry Magazine, Lighten Up Online, New Verse News, The Orchards Poetry Journal, Philosophy Now, Pulsebeat Poetry Journal, The Road Not Taken: A Journal of Formal Poetry, Snakeskin, and Well Read. His collection I Tried (And Other Poems, Too) was published in 2023 by Kelsay Books.

N-WORD UPDATE

by Jerome Betts

AI-generated graphic by Shutterstock for The New Verse News

When a person, without ifs or buts,

Whose mouth too infrequently shuts

    Makes rambling remarks

   About Lecter and sharks . . . 

Yes, he’s weird, and, quite possibly,  ****.

Jerome Betts lives in Devon, England, where he edits the quarterly Lighten Up Online.

ALL IN THE FAMILY

by David Southward

Rocky, who declined to provide his last name because he works downtown, was calling out to delegates and others leaving the RNC on Wednesday night, asking them about their views on LGBT issues. "You crashed our website!" he said, referring to news that Grindr was experiencing outages in Milwaukee during the RNC due to high traffic.—USA Today Network, July 19, 2024

While red-blooded men in Milwaukee
went ape on a gay walkie-talkie—
their fists pumped at Trump
while trolling for rump—
this fairy stayed home making gnocchi.


David Southward teaches in the Honors College at the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. He is the author of Apocrypha (Wipf & Stock 2018) and Bachelor's Buttons (Kelsay Books 2020).

SOUL

by Frank John Edwards

It must be that something is broke,

When the sermons that Jesus once spoke,

Would land him in trouble

In some Christians’ bubble

For being excessively woke.

Frank John Edwards is a former military helicopter pilot, now a writer and physician living in rural New York. He has had poems published in various journals including the Virginia Quarterly Review.

CALEDONIAN FIGHTING FISH

[Scotland's] First Minister Nicola Sturgeon has said there are "significant questions" about Alex Salmond's political comeback. Her comments came after Mr Salmond revealed he would be among the new Alba Party's regional list candidates. The former first minister said his aim was to build "a supermajority for independence" after the May election. —BBC, March 27, 2021

Jerome Betts lives in Devon, England, and edits the verse quarterly Lighten Up On Line. His work has appeared in a wide variety of British magazines and anthologies as well as UK, European, and North American web publications such as Amsterdam Quarterly, Autumn Sky Poetry Daily, The Asses of Parnassus, Better Than Starbucks, The Hypertexts, Light, The New Verse News, and Snakeskin.

A LIMERICK ON DECEPTION

by Richard Hacken

The tenure at West Point was fleeting

For freshman cadets caught cheating.

When shown to the door, 

They said, "It's no more

Than our Commander-in-Chief did by tweeting!"

Richard Hacken is a librarian-poet with degrees in German literature and past appointments at U.C. Davis, Oregon State, University of Kansas and BYU. He has kissed the Blarney Stone, yet his only visits to Limerick have been virtual.

GOVERNMENT DIS-SERVICE ADMINISTRATION

by Margaret Rozga

Cartoon by Ann Telnaes, The Washington Post, November 20, 2020.

There once was a sycophant named Murphy

who claimed more than was her turf-y.

She refused to sign that the winner had won

and let the loser know his term was near done,

forsaking duty to go topsy turvy

Margaret Rozga’s latest work was to co-edit a newly released poetry anthology, Through This Door: Wisconsin in Poems.

LAME-DUCK LIMERICK

by Patricia Mosco Holloway

Drawing by Dominic Xavier at rediff.com, November 9, 2020.

A plan to remove the stout lout:

We let him rage on, threaten, pout.

     Still valid, our tally.

     Get him to a rally.

Then all we need do?  "Lock Him OUT!" 

Patricia Mosco Holloway is a writing teacher in Denver, Colorado. She has poems published in The New Verse News, Rattle, The Ekphrastic Review, and Silver Edge.

THE PAIN IN SPAIN

by Jerome Betts

BARCELONA — The leader of Catalonia said Wednesday night that he wanted a negotiated settlement to the region’s conflict with the Spanish government, but he did not offer to shelve his secessionist plan. —The New York Times, October 4, 2017


Catalonia's vote was galvanic.
On the ship of state's bridge there is panic.
   Madrid seems to envision
   Not a minor collision
But the iceberg that split the Titanic.

Jerome Betts lives in Devon, England, and edits the quarterly Lighten Up Online. His verse has appeared in a wide variety of British magazines and anthologies as well as UK, European, and North American web venues such as Amsterdam Quarterly, Angle, Light, The Asses of Parnassus, TheNewVerse.News, Parody, Per Contra, The Rotary Dial, and Snakeskin.

YA THINK?

William Aarnes lives in South Carolina.