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Friday, April 27, 2012

ELECTION YEAR GIFTS

by Diane Payne

Source: condomania

Daughter receives a text message from her mother stating:
Wear a condom.
Republicans are pro-life.
You know what that means.


Daughter receives an Obama nightie in the mail,
a weirdly political gift from her mother.  It’s pink.   Perversely
cute.  Libertarian boyfriend shakes his head in horror.
She moves Obama’s lips and whispers, “Don’t you
want me tonight?” He wonders if he’ll ever want her again.

Daughter receives an envelope filled with Obama  2012 bumper
stickers. For your friends at college, Mother scrawls on the
note. It’s daughter’s first presidential election.  She
has no use for bumper stickers.  Sighs.  It’s only March.
Eight more months of merchandise propaganda.

Daughter longs for old days when apolitical cookies arrived in the mail.


Diane Payne shares her home with several dogs and cats, and during breaks from college, her daughter reappears.   Diane  teaches English at University of Arkansas-Monticello.   She has been published in hundreds of literary journals.
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