by Philip Kitcher
“We have a vice president who is the least admired, least respected, and the worst vice president in the history of our country.” —Donald Trump’s lie at a press conference, August 8, 2024
Villains who drew a Vice-President’s salary?
Wander with me through an infamous gallery.
Dubya’s chief deputy, kindred of Vader –
Swap him for Kamala? Why would we trade her?
Spiro T. Agnew, indicted offender, he
Ended up pleading a nolo contendere.
Spiro was Vice to a Prez with a record:
Nixon’s own Veephood was… shall we say “Checkered”?
So many cases: Trump’s judgment’s a mystery –
So many scoundrels abound in our history.
How could he quell the desire to impugn
Militant slavers like John C. Calhoun?
Was it repression? Or was there a reason?
Secret respect for the Breckinridge treason?
Does he forget his self-righteous offense?
“Traitors must hang! We should spare no ex-Pence!”
Flippant accuser, their peer in his felony,
Blind to the crimes of a shady miscellany!
Dubya’s chief deputy, kindred of Vader –
Swap him for Kamala? Why would we trade her?
Spiro T. Agnew, indicted offender, he
Ended up pleading a nolo contendere.
Spiro was Vice to a Prez with a record:
Nixon’s own Veephood was… shall we say “Checkered”?
So many cases: Trump’s judgment’s a mystery –
So many scoundrels abound in our history.
How could he quell the desire to impugn
Militant slavers like John C. Calhoun?
Was it repression? Or was there a reason?
Secret respect for the Breckinridge treason?
Does he forget his self-righteous offense?
“Traitors must hang! We should spare no ex-Pence!”
Flippant accuser, their peer in his felony,
Blind to the crimes of a shady miscellany!
Philip Kitcher has written too many books about philosophy, a subject which he taught at Columbia for many years. His poems have appeared online in Light, Lighten Up Online, Politics/Letters, Snakeskin, and The Dirigible Balloon; and in print in the Hudson Review.